IntroductionA friend one day confides that she’s considering “ending it all.” That her life has become so terribly unbearable, there is no reason to go on.
After the initial shock, your first reaction may be to shrug off the suicide threat and assure the friend that her life really isn’t so bad after all.
Don’t.
Trying to convince someone that they have everything to live for may only increase their feelings of guilt and hopelessness. If someone tells you they are thinking about suicide, even casually or in jest, pay attention! No suicide threat should be dismissed or taken lightly.
Rarely does someone commit suicide out of the blue.
They drop hints, speak outright of their desire and exhibit certain predictable behaviors. These may be:
- a preoccupation with death;
- a loss of interest in things they ordinarily cared about;
- visiting or phoning loved ones;
- making arrangements or setting one’s life in order;
- giving away prized possessions;
- comments about hopelessness, helplessness or worthlessness; and
- daring or risk-taking behavior.
Be direct. As uncomfortable as it might be, talk openly and matter of factly to the person about suicide and be prepared to listen in a non-judgmental way. Pose direct questions, for example, does the person have a plan?
If possible, try not to act shocked, as this will only place distance between you and the person.
Above all, do not swear to secrecy.
This is a time when you need support. Trust your instincts that something is terribly wrong and that the person may be in deep trouble. Reassure them that help is available, depression is treatable and suicidal feelings are temporary. Urge them to contact a social worker or other mental health professional, a community mental health agency, a family doctor, a school psychologist or counselor.
The decision to commit suicide is quite often a desire to stop suffering. Never give up on someone just because he or she tells you he’s made up his or her mind.
Phoning 911, or taking the person to a hospital emergency room is a valid option. So is calling a crisis intervention center or a suicide hotline (see below for key numbers and organizations).
If possible, remove or hide any potentially dangerous items, such as pills, firearms and other weapons, even belts and ropes.
- 1- 800-784-2433, or SAVE (Suicide Awareness Voices of Education)
- or 1-800-273-TALK (8255) (National Suicide Prevention Lifeline)
- Or 1-800-SUICIDE (784-2433) (The National Mental Health Association)
- More people die from suicide than from homicide in the U.S. every year.
- Roughly 30,000 Americans commit suicide annually, while 500,000 attempt.
- For young people ages 15 to 24, suicide is the third leading cause of death.
- Men are far more likely to die from suicide than women. However, women are more likely to attempt suicide than men are.
- Suicide rates are generally higher than the national average in the western states and lower in the eastern and midwestern states.
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